Life Observations from my Mama

We stole this list from someone really funny!

1. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.
2. There is great need for a sarcasm font.
3. How the heck are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
4. Was learning cursive really necessary?
5. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on #5.  I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood
6. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the Person died.
7. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.
8. Bad decisions make good stories.
9. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.
10. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection......again.
11. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.
12. I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello?), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voice mail.   What did you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?
13. I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.
14. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
15. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.
16. I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option
17. I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.
18. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?
19. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front.  Stay strong, brothers and sisters!
20. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.
21. As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
22. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                       Shine on! XO - Heather Granger